DBlog Week – One Great Thing

“Living with diabetes sure does take a lot of work, and it’s easy to be hard on ourselves if we aren’t “perfect”.  But today it’s time to give ourselves some much deserved credit.  Tell us about just one diabetes thing you does spectacularly!  Fasting blood sugar checks, oral meds sorted and ready, something always on hand to treat a low, or anything that you do for diabetes.  Nothing is too big or too small to celebrate doing well!”

I had a hard time with this post. In fact, as I was trying to think of what I do well.. all I could think of were things I don’t do well enough. I don’t think I’m alone in saying that I tend to beat myself up a lot when it comes to managing my diabetes.  I get comments occasionally from people telling me how impressed they are or how they could never give themselves shots (you know we’ve all heard that once .. or a million .. times.)

So I asked my husband, “What do you think is something I do well in regards to managing my diabetes?”  He said without hesitating “You are so aware of what’s going on. You know when anything feels ‘off’ and know how to fix it.”

So I thought about that.  And yes, I do know when I’m not feeling “right” (most of the time – we all have those days when we have false symptoms) .. but at the same time, no matter how well I’m doing with that awareness…. why am I not taking better care of myself overall?  

When thinking about this prompt for the last few days .. all I could think about were the things that I might do “well” but that I need to do better.

I could say I’m always prepared.  For the most part, I am.  I wear my medical bracelet, I carry a big enough purse so that I have my meter, phone (in case of emergency), and I almost always have some sort of fast acting sugar on me, in case of a low that I need to fight off.  But there have been times when I have been carrying around an empty tube of glucose tabs, and then of course go low in the middle of Target.  And I rarely have an extra infusion set with me – not unless I know I will be doing a site change at work. I need to be better about that, too.

I could say I eat well and exercise.  But I don’t.  I need to be better about both of those … and I will be. Just haven’t gotten there yet.

I could say I change my lancets and my pump/CGM sites out as frequently as I’m supposed to. But I don’t.  (I also don’t always wash my hands before testing, either. Tsk tsk.)  I always stretch them out several a few extra days, so as to give myself a little extra time before poking another hole in my body. (I’ve always imagined if I were to drink a lot of water, would it spill out of me like a metal pail of water that had holes poked into it?)

I could say that I am good on educating others about diabetes.  And maybe in some way I am. But I don’t always feel like I am – if anything, I feel like even after almost 20 years, I’M the one that needs educating.  This has become a recent passion of mine – to raise awareness and educate others. I hope for it to one day cross over into my worklife in some capacity.

But one thing I think I am doing well lately … is blogging/talking about my diabetes. Which in turn, has affected all of those things I just mentioned. I’ve never ever been ashamed to talk about it. It has raised my self awareness more than it ever has, and I am more educated about my disease than I have ever been.  Even though I know I still have LOTS to learn.

And I also feel like I do a good job at not letting my diabetes be any bigger of a hindrance than it has to be in my daily life.  It’s always there, and realistically, it always will be.  But I get to choose who is running this show (for the most part).  I’ve never let it beat me down.  If anything, I don’t pay enough attention to it so we can work in partnership with each other.  (Hence the self awareness) 

I know I got a little off topic here.. the point of the post was to pat myself on the back, but I’m just keeping it real. And if anything, maybe pointing out to myself (and the world) the things I need to work on .. THAT deserves a pat for acknowledging those things and making an effort to improve.  🙂  I mean come on .. it’s in writing now, so I have to do something about it, right? 

Thanks again, Karen for organizing, and allowing me to participate in D-Blog Week!