Burned out?

I’ve read a few different friends’ blogs over the last couple of years where they talk about getting burned out with the DOC (Diabetes Online Community)… whether it’s by comments made, or just simply feeling the pressures of feeling like they have to keep up with their blog posts on a regular/daily basis.

I’ve never really felt burned out, per se, but I have had to put it on a back burner for several reasons the last year.

But something that I have started to realize is I think one reason I’m not posting as often … I tend to sometimes find myself envious, jealous, whatever you want to call it. That sounds silly of me to even say that, but if I’m being completely honest, it’s true. Don’t get me wrong, the DOC has quite literally been a life saver for me – I’ve said it a million times and I’ll say it again .. it has kept me more in line and more in tune with my diabetes than I’ve EVER been in the now 21+ years I’ve lived as a T1. And I’m in better control now than I ever have been.

But I sometimes find myself thinking things like “Why can’t my A1C be as good as so-and-so’s” or “Why do I require so much more insulin than he/she does?” or “Why do they get invited to different events and I don’t?” or “Why do they get asked to trial such and such product, and I don’t?” Then I start coming up with reasons – “It’s because you ate that pizza last night.” or “If you didn’t eat so many carbs, your insulin needs would go way down.” or “They put their heart and soul into their advocacy efforts and blogs, and all you do is update your blog every now and then.”

Before you say it, yes, I know none of those are rational, even if they are true. And I’m in no way wallowing in self pity … just being honest. And deep down I do know that YDMV (Your Diabetes May Vary) – each and every one of us have different ways we need to control our diabetes.

I’m going to still continue blogging – it’s lethargic and helpful for me. And the comments/emails I get from people that read my posts are enough reason to continue. 🙂 Like I’ve said many times, I only wish I’d had these friends/blogs when I was going through the first 18ish years of living with this … but at least it’s available NOW and it’s only looking UP from here. 🙂

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About Shannon

I am a wife, a mommy, and a Type 1 diabetic (since '92.) I have had two successful pregnancies - one of which was with twins. I wear an insulin pump- - off and on for 17 years; currently on the Medtronic pump and CGM. I am not a medical professional, nor am I giving medical advice. I am just sharing my day to day stories of someone who lives with this disease every day. My ultimate goal is to raise awareness.
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9 Responses to Burned out?

  1. StephenS says:

    Shannon, I find your stories to be helpful and inspirational no matter how often you post or what is going on in your d-life and elsewhere. I support you… no conditions.

  2. Scott E says:

    What can I say, Shannon — part of me understands completely how you feel (and is why I try not to divulge my A1cs or pay attention to those of others) and yet another part of me is guilty because I’m heading to my first-ever “invited event” right now. But know that you are important and I feel I can relate to you, which is why I love reading what you write.

    • Shannon says:

      Are you going to the Medtronic Forum? If so, that’s awesome!!!! Envious, but HAPPY for you!!

      • Scott E says:

        I am. Your blog gets the last comment I wrote before they forced me to turn off my electronic devices (sorry if it seemed rushed) and the first since landing.

        What can I say… I wish you were here. But being away from my family is going to be tough, and you’ve got some little ones with you who are glad you’re staying with them.

      • Shannon says:

        Thanks, friend! I am glad you’re there! I know you will offer loads of great perspectives for all of us! Can’t wait to hear updates 🙂

  3. Tina Ghosn says:

    Hey chickadee – I hear you. While I haven’t ever got burned out of the DOC I too compare my parenting of cwd with how others parent and yes the A1Cs. I try to ignore the posts with “no hitter” CGM graphs and picture perfect A1Cs but at the same time I want to congratulate those that achieve the good results. Still also wanting to support those that work hard but haven’t quite met their own goals. I have to constantly remind myself that diabetes is different for everyone.
    as far as the events and trials. Ive not been invited to any events but one day I hope my name will be tossed into a pool of ‘people that should come’ but if not no worries. As far as trials – well it helps that we live so close to institutions where stuff is always happening. Not sure how others get to play with new toys but for me and my kids I just sent an email that said “sex now, yes please” and bam we are in every trial. Disclaimer: my email was supposed to say “Dexcom, yes please” but silly spell check. I was answering an email blast asking parents interested in having their kids try the G4. Not suggesting you start sending emails to diabetes toy manufactures offering up sex.
    Anyway – your day will come and the community will be better for it.
    Love you.

  4. Keiran says:

    I’m bad at updating my own blog as well – and a lot of your reasons are the same as mine. Different triggers, sure, but same reasons, irrational or not. Good ol’ self-doubt and (in my case) depression and all that ‘fun’. Ha.

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